Calvin, look! You got a letter! A letter? I didn't hear the mail truck. A letter for me? The return address says North Pole. Oh my gosh, it must be from Santa! Santa sent me a letter! Read it! Read it! Dear Calvin, you rotten little kid... Oh no!! Santa called me rotten! I'm doomed! Keep reading. I made a list, but I didn't bother checking it twice, because obviously you're the naughtiest kid in the whole world. I'm writing to give you one last chance. You've got seven days to get on the good boy list. Seven days?! Oh no! What can I do? I'd suggest you start by being kind to animals. Perhaps you know an animal who would like a snack soon. Or maybe you should let an animal read your comic books sometime. Think about it. Sounds like sane advice. Signed, Santa Claws? Wait a minute! I recognize this handwriting! Give you a snack, huh?! How about a knuckle sandwich?! Hmph. Well, it's a snack.