The meeting of G.R.O.S.S. comes to order. Hobbes reads the minutes of the last meeting. Calvin proposed a resolution condemning existence of girls. First tiger abstains from vote. Patriotism of first tiger called into question. Philosophical discussion, followed by bandages being administered. Hobbes ends with reading they forgot what debate was about, so medals of bravery were awarded to all.

Today's meeting of G.R.O.S.S. is to devise a plan to annoy the enemy. Hobbes writes the proposal is greeted with huzzahs. Calvin says they've tolerated the enemy's presence too long. Hobbes writes there are shouts of assent, followed by pandemonium. Calvin says leading a club is a heady experience. Hobbes says good minutes turn into riots.

G.R.O.S.S. field scout Calvin reports the enemy has been sighted. Hobbes asks a question. Hobbes asks what activity the enemy was engaged in. Calvin replies "girl stuff". Hobbes says to say no more.

G.R.O.S.S. makes a plan to write a fake code that "accidentally" will fall into Susie's hands. She'll decode the message saying not to go behind the house, where they'll wait for her with water balloons. Hobbes asks why they just don't hit her with water balloons where she's sitting. Calvin says Hobbes is a good officer, but he doesn't have an executive mind.

Calvin writes a coded message. Calvin writes backwards. He hopes Susie isn't too dumb to figure out the code. Hobbes says cracking codes is second nature to cool spies like them.

The coded message to Hobbes says their plans will be ruined if Susie goes behind the house at noon. Calvin's regret is blowing the best day of his life while he's so young.

Calvin sees Susie still playing. He and Hobbes will walk past Susie and drop the top secret, coded letter for Hobbes. They walk past, drop the note, and Calvin says if it falls into a girl's hands, their plans will be ruined. Behind a tree, Calvin says everything is working perfectly. Hobbes says except she isn't picking up the letter.

Calvin wonders why Susie doesn't pick up the letter. Calvin is frustrated. Hobbes wonders if she wasn't paying attention to them. Calvin thinks it's inconceivable anyone wouldn't be interested in everything they do.

Hobbes sees Susie picking up the letter. She walks over, and returns the letter to Calvin. Hobbes says that was awfully decent of her. Calvin bangs his hands on the tree, saying everybody gets good enemies except him.

Calvin and Hobbes walk by Susie again. They mention the top secret note again. Calvin mentions Susie finding the letter and spoiling their plans again. Behind the tree, Hobbes sees Susie opening the letter. Calvin was worried he'd have to hit her on the head and read it to her.

Susie reads the coded note. She's suspicious. She yells that she better hurry over to spoil their plans. Calvin says she fell for it, so off they go.

Calvin and Hobbes grab water balloons. They hide behind a bush. Hobbes wonders what's keeping her. Calvin thinks she got lost.

Calvin wonders why Susie isn't walking into their ambush. Calvin is going on a reconnaissance mission to find out what she's doing. Hobbes wonders why he can't go. Calvin says if Susie captured him, he'd tell Susie anything for a tummy rub.

Calvin says you can't trust a girl to do anything right. When he finds her, he'll get Hobbes and they'll hit her with the water balloons. As he approaches the corner of the house, he says if Susie won't come to the ambush, they'll bring it to her. Around the corner stands Susie, with the water hose in her hand. She starts a countdown.

Hobbes hears the sounds of Calvin being soaked by Susie. Calvin walks over to him and sits down. He tells Hobbes this doesn't go into the club log. It never happened. Hobbes says since he's already wet, it seems a shame to waste their water balloons.

Calvin says it's a dark day for G.R.O.S.S. His plan backfired, and he got soaked. Hobbes asks if he can be dictator-for-life if Calvin resigns.

Calvin says the battle was lost, but the war goes on. He says the spirit of G.R.O.S.S. will not be extinguished. He awards bottle caps of valor for their courage in the face of temporary setbacks. Hobbes says a good meeting always ends with them getting medals.

Mom brings Calvin some lunch. They decide to read comic books in their treehouse. Calvin says it's looking like a good afternoon.